Returning to Old Notes
Every so often, I dive back into my notes from years gone by. It’s a way to ensure I haven’t strayed too far from the path I once set for myself. Although only a handful of people seem interested in these private reflections, a handful is not the same as no one at all. Occasionally, a message from a curious mind lands in my inbox, reminding me that these thoughts resonate beyond my own head.
Yesterday, I felt compelled to revisit an entry from October 1993. Below are a few snippets from those musings, still as relevant to me now as they were then.
October 1993: The World of Information
“The beginning of the world and the Big Bang. Should I believe this? Should you? Where is the flaw in the narrative? What’s missing, misunderstood, or understated?
Here’s my take (borrowing from Popper): beyond the world of matter and the realm of geometry, there exists a world of information. We don’t fully understand this world yet, but we sense it—just the tip of an iceberg. New, bold ideas are needed, new mathematical structures to chart this realm. Today, we are only scratching the surface.
This third world—the world of information—must integrate with the other two. It’s not some distant future; this new paradigm is already here, hanging in the air like a ghost. And this is where I must focus: full steam ahead toward information, toward algorithms, toward the structure tree. This has become the content of my life, my calling.
Who knows what I’ll discover along the way? Searching for information, I might stumble upon something even greater. But nothing is more important than this pursuit. Information is life. Information is complexity."
On Tactics and Purpose
“But strategy is not enough. Tactics matter, too. I embraced the audacity of youth. Be bold. Be rowdy. Life demands action, constant action. And with that, comes the realization: I must shed responsibilities that don’t serve this purpose. I am a researcher, not a teacher. A scholar, not an administrator. And certainly not a director. My task is not to manage or organize but to build knowledge, to create something unknown that will one day be known. That is my holy calling. So help me, God.”
April 1994: The Anthropic Principle and Life’s Questions
A year later, in April 1994, I was grappling with the anthropic principle:
"Does a theory make sense when it leaves such a narrow window for the emergence of life? Can something as organized as life arise from chaos? The anthropic principle provides no real answers. It's no explanation to say that the universe must be the way it is because otherwise, we wouldn’t exist to observe it.
Where did the laws of nature come from? Why these laws and not others? The argument that ‘it couldn't be any other way’ falls flat. What is explanation anyway?
And what is chance?"
A Personal Shift: Technology and Self-Reflection
"On a more mundane note, I received a grant. It was just enough to buy a notebook. Will life be easier with a notebook? A little. But is that enough to change everything? Hardly."
Navigating Blindness: The Search for Free Will
The challenge looms: how can the blind lead the blind? How do we reach a generator of free will without the freedom to reach it? Mechanically, I can only detect what is mechanical, and even that requires tremendous effort. Yet here I stand, the best possible laboratory at my disposal: myself. I am both the experimenter and the most sensitive instrument.
My goal has become clear. I must produce a device—a mind—that won’t need external forces to guide it. But is that what I want? I want to take stock of everything I know and push further. I want to gather the fragments of my understanding and draw meaningful conclusions.
Years ago, I didn’t know what I was searching for as a physicist. I was drawn to the idea of additional dimensions, but for reasons that remain unclear, I got sidetracked. I lost more than a year in uncertainty until I encountered the works of Sheldrake, Popper, Eccles, and Jeans. Slowly, the fog lifted, and my mission crystallized: to discover a third factor that exists beyond matter and geometry.
This third factor is information—knowledge. My purpose now is to bridge the gap between modern physics and this new reservoir of understanding. The challenge lies in finding a safe path forward, one that doesn’t fall into the murky waters of philosophy. It’s clear to me now that quantum theory is the key.
Today: The Premonition Endures
Here I am, years later, still chasing that same premonition I had in the '90s. Consciousness, I believe, cannot change the facts themselves, but it can influence their probabilities. How? That’s where the devil hides—in the details. And that’s what I’m still working on.
The journey continues.
This mix of self-reflection, science, and philosophy still defines my work today. The questions I grappled with decades ago remain as crucial and unsolved as ever, but the pursuit is what drives me forward—full steam ahead.
P.S. 29-09-24 11:42 This is a partial answer to Igor Bayak asking in his comment what do I mean by "information"? Reading an autobiography of Stefan Osswiecki:
"Stefan Ossowiecki (1877-1944), a businessman by profession, was also a psychic whose clairvoyant abilities made him famous in his native Poland. He became known internationally as a result of numerous successful experiments with Polish, French and British psychical researchers."
"Today's knowledge, based on intellectualism and experimentation, has been profaned as it has become available to both heroes and criminals alike. Not everything should be shared with everyone. Modern man has forgotten the warning of the greatest Sage: “Do not cast your pearls before swine, lest they turn on you and trample them underfoot, and then attack you.” Who knows whether this profanation of nature’s mysteries, this brutal intrusion of modern technology into the subtlest vibrations of matter, this apparent triumph of the intellect, will one day mark the beginning of an unprecedented catastrophe in the history of the modern world?The ancient Atlanteans unleashed the forces of the elements, and, unable to control them, perished. We today are no different. We are on the brink of collapse, for our civilization has also violently intruded into nature’s secrets without sufficiently cultivating morality in heart and spirit. Today, while flying through the skies and plumbing the ocean’s depths, the people of the 20th century consider themselves victors over nature. But in reality, they are spiritually bankrupt, selfish in their bloody struggle for existence, blinded by their own arrogance, cold and empty-hearted. Their airplanes, submarines, radios, and wireless telegraphs—tools that could be the glory of life if driven by a noble will—may soon become a curse. When hatred and greed unleash yet another war, all of this technology will become instruments of death, not life"
"... As a mathematician, I do not at all agree with the Author's point of view. and I am not at all ready to consider the tensor algebra as "the mother" of the other algebras. But as a reviewer, I observe that the Author supports his thesis with interesting arguments (in other words, it is not just propaganda), and I wish his paper to become a useful contribution to the debate."